It's not a big deal, it's really not, but the Lord must have knew I needed a jump start this morning because today has been full of this sort of mishaps.
Today was full of good intentions, and yet I feel like it's been just a trial filled day. Phone calls coming in that made my heart heavy and me sitting on the couch thinking, praying and dwelling too long on things I absolutely can't change. In fact, they aren't mine to change at all.
I think letting go and truly trusting that God will fix things is still one of the hardest lessons for me to learn. Especially, when it comes to my children. I want to fix things! I want to put bandaids on things. I want to pour out my infinite wisdom upon them and watch them eat it up like it was a giant hot plate of spaghetti, but more times than not it doesn't happen that way. Often times I see the plate pushed away in stubborn rebellion.
I try to console myself with who I was once upon a time. That I made it. I grew. I had to learn lessons outside of my parents. They were good for me. I wonder if my parents felt as much frustration at times as I have felt. Oh wait...there was that one time...and that other time...okay yes they did! This actually gives me hope and a little peace.
Anyway...as I was making lunch today for the 4 boys I grabbed the box of angel hair pasta out of the pantry and the noodles sprayed all over the floor. I had to actually pause and take a breath and remind myself that this is NO big deal. Keep on going...it's life....the endless chant, today, that keeps running through my head.
Monday, November 07, 2011
Posted by Trina at 1:56 PM