Saturday, July 21, 2007

Ponderings of Six

Today, I have been pondering about the little one that I am carrying. The little one I don't know yet. Gale asked me, in her comment, about my feeling of having six. She said it was a pivotal time for her, and wondered if I may feel the same. I would say, yes. It has made me think about so many things, though. It feels so much bigger than being a mother to six at this point. Its about where I thought I would be at my age, and where I am. I figured I would be done with pregnancies and babies at 36, but here I sit, carrying another. Strange, indeed.

I think if you ask any of my friends from my childhood they would all say that they believed I would be the mother of a few. I just never REALLY knew how many I wanted. Some say 2 with such confidence, or we want 4, and here is why. I never had that answer with the pure commitment that so many of my friends have had. I can't answer why, except the Lord has kept my heart wide open. I never dreamed of having girls either, but I never saw myself with a lineage of sons. Again my mind has been wide open. I can't imagine life any different now. Now I am just committed to a large family. My heart runneth over when I look at my boys. Each one is a great joy to me and Den. We talk about how thankful we are for them daily. They are a gift from God.

Someday, to say that I am mother of six does seem strange. My grandmother said it, and I know plenty of sisters who say it to this day. I have always admired them for their willingness to give it all to the Lord. I am grateful to be in the running. My eyes can tear up with complete gratitude that God saw me fit enough to have children at all, because honestly I am not special. I guess I am just willing and he is giving. Its a great combination. However, I know that there are those who want children and can't have them, but God has a special plan and reason in all of our lives. Why he chooses who he chooses I don't understand.

I will have my days of complaint as the morning sickness increases, and stays with me through October. However, I also know that without the morning sickness my little one will probably not make it. It is a good sign for my body. Although I hate it, I have learned to appreciate what it means on this journey.

For now, I feel humbled that the Lord answered me and Den's prayer. We didn't prayer for another, but that He would show us His will. We had a small part to do with it, however all life is from the Lord. Only He can give it, and take it away. So thank you Lord for another opportunity. Your will be done.

22 comments:

Michelle Swank said...

Congrats!!! Welcome to the club lol!! I am so excited for you. Every little bundle is a blessing. Sometimes we have to trials through our pregnancy and sometimes it is smooth sailing. I pray that you can have a fabulous pregnancy. I am sorry you are having morning sickness but it is true it is to be expected for most of us. You have a great looking family and have been blessed tremendously.

Love & Prayers
MS

Mrs.Martin said...

Well, I totally agree that the Lord is in the miracle of having more chidren. We always wanted a large family by age 30 and got our little stray, lagging behind the group, blessing baby, 10 years later. And you know the journey, because you were right there with me. Yet, I know this is what the Lord wanted. And then I lost another pregnancy again in the spring, which was a reminder that the Lord is more in the process than we are. I love you so much and Colin and I are excited for this new little bundle to come. Take care of yourself. Love you Sis.

michelle said...

Trina ,I am out here in Colorado with Betha for two weeks and not at church today,so while she is asleep I popped on the computer to check on my friends.How exciting for you!I am very happy for you and your family.I myself would love to have a new little one and be expecting ,I liked being expecting of course unlike most of you out there I didn't get sick.Out of all my six pregancies I was sick about 7 or 8 times.But I think for now we are not having anymore Brian has decided that six is enough and that mybe I can just pray that someone will move to our part and have a baby for me to hold anytime I want.Haha ...only one I know moving to our part is Chantel so I guess I better start praying.. michelle g.

Trina said...

Michelle: Thanks for the club welcoming...hehehe I read through your blog and thought oh my, so much to look forward to..lol Im glad you are doing better right now. These babies are so worth it, but wouldn't it be nice if we could just buy one at Walmart? Oh the choices....hehehe

Mrs. Martin: You have to go through some losses to truly appreciate the miracle of life. I wouldn't wish it on anyone, but it sure changes your perspective on how much we really are in control, doesn't it? You and Colin are always so supportive and sweet about our babies. I love that!

Michelle: I love it that you want another. Too sweet! We have thought we were done only to discover that we weren't...hehehe I will get on with praying about someone bringing in a baby to that assembly...aka Chantel! LOL

Fifi said...

I am so excited for you Trina! Hubby and I talked the other day of having another child too.... we'll see what happens!I need to lose weight first!!!!
I will be praying for a secure pregnancy and for peace to be over you and the little one!
Love to you!

Madeleine said...

What a beautiful testimony.

John & I have always opened our hearts to the Lord's leading, specially in this area. We always siad, "oh at least 6". We have 3 children in almost 23 years. I am so thankful you are so happy.

And though I will be 40 next month :::::GASP:::: I would still have another one in a heart beat. :)

Angel said...

You're a wonderful mom, Trina. I think you have realized what God has called you to...and you answer the calling well. His gifts have not been missed by you...you serve Him well. (((hugs)))

Cherrie said...

I am so excited for you. Babys are the sweetest things. I am praying for you. I also am praying that God will send the bug Chantels way. hehehe....love you and take care..

Anonymous said...

I am glad you are going to be blessed again. It feels like forever while you go through the morning sickness but it does end. I was always glad to remember that. Take it easy when you need to. I'll be praying for you.
Sylvia

KarenW said...

Congratulations! I think 6 is an awesome number of children. So many blessings. God bless and I hope your morning sickness doesn't last so long.

la bellina mammina said...

from reading your blog, I'd gather that you're a fantastic mom, Trina. I love reading your news when things get pretty rough for me, and I only have 3 boys! Sending my prayers and thoughts your way..

Trina said...

Fifi: I wondered if I had caught a glimpse of you thinking of another baby in a comment you had left at one time...hehehe I hope its soon, and we could do this together. That would be neat!

madeleine: I think that is soooo wonderful that your heart is still so open to it. Good for you!!

Angel: Awww that is so sweet of you to say. I truly want to be a good mom, I truly do!!

Cherrie: I would love it if Chantel ended up pregnant with me...hehehe, although I know she has always been so content with her life.

Sylvia: Morning sickness is the worst dread for me. My sister and I get it so horribly, but you are so right, it will pass...ugghh! hehehe

Karen: Thank you so much! 6 is still amazing to me. I hope my morning sickness doesnt linger either....*sigh*

labellina: I hope things are well with you!! I love reading about your life and your perspective on being a mom too!

marykathryn said...

Well I am sooooo excited about the big news, That goes without saying!! You and Den are wonderful parents and this new little addition will be greatly loved by so many!!! Can't wait to see its little angel face ...Sigh...I miss you and I pray every night for your dreaded morning sickness and that you are able to continue to endure!! Mother of 6..Who knew??..hehe
Love You!!

Marisela said...

Well, that is so exciting!!! Congradulations....I will be praying for you, and the new little one. I know how sick you get it's horrible! But it sounds like you have the right frame of mind about it. It will be exciting to live there by you and get to enjoy holding a little newborn again! I"M EXCITED!

Isaida said...

Hi Trina,

Congratulations on the little one!

Sis. Lori P. said...

Trina, did you know that after March when you have delivered your sixth child that there will be a name for you? Yep...you will be called a "Grand Multipara"! I love that phrase...sounds so grand. That's what you call a woman who has given birth to more than 5 children. I am very pleased by all I have read in your musings about allowing for the Lord's will in your life concerning how many children you have. In today's world, it is often forgotten that the fruit of the womb is God's reward. Key word there...reward. Not saying that any of us girls really deserve a reward...but with a heart to be a servant to your family and in this seeing how it is the way we serve the Lord as women you can begin to see how it is a reward. I think I have written before how I think the role of older women in our world has been lost to many younger ones. Not many young women get to see a heart like yours concerning welcoming a little one into your life and blessing God for his mercy to give a fruitful womb to us. May God bless you for your willing heart and may your words on this blog and to anyone else you talk to about His blessings of a fruitful womb land on ears that are hungry to hear.

Trina said...

Mary: Thank you so much for the prayers. I will take all I can get! Remember all the time we have talked about the Lord, the gift of children, and how many to have? Well He has been working hasn't he? 6...lol

Marisela: Yes, another one to hold. We will have some catching up to do with each other's families. You have Hayden now that I need to get to know, you will need to get to know Roman, and now a new addition. Our families just keep growing and growing!

Mami: Thank you very much!

Sis. Lori: That was a really neat comment! Im sure Den is enjoying reading it from his office as well. I hope that others will find comfort in my journey. Its been a long, winding, journey that the Lord has taken me on, and I have really enjoyed seeing my heart and mind change along the way.

meNmykids said...

Six was such a defining moment, I thought it would be for you. Really makes you think about yourself and how you got where you are. So good to hear ones thankful for what God has given them.

meNmykids said...

Morning sickness is a monster, but don't forget to pray. Sometimes we get so stuck with the "just accept it" attitude we forget to pray for relief. God wants us to ask.

Trina said...

Gale: You are so right about remembering to pray about it. So often in my other pregnancies I have had the "just accept it" attitude. Now, I am already begging God a few times a day. I get so nervous when I think about the seriousness of the m/s that is ahead of me that I am having many many chats with the Lord...

Marisela said...

I am looking forward to catching up with you. Maybe our little boys will be good friends. I am looking forward to getting out there and getting settled. Only one more month!

Lori said...

Oh Ms. Trina do not say that you aren't special - you most certainly are!!! Your faith is so inspiring and your love for family is to be admired! I am just beaming for you!!