I am trying to be better about taking care of my husband. The other day I was talking to Cheryl, who is reading a book titled, "Created to be His Help Meet". Its a wonderful book, that I hope she lets me borrow when she is done..*hint hint*. We have had some inspirational conversations about this book, and a rekindled desire to be a better wife, the way God intended. Some of the statements in this book were so basic, and yet so profound. You think it can't possibly be that simple to make your husband that happy, but it is. Well at least mine...lol.
The other day, Den and I were driving to Wal-Mart with the boys to buy our bi-weekly 2 tons of groceries. On our way, I asked Den what he had envisioned his wife to bring to his life. He quickly ( a little too quickly) said, "I thought she would be like my Mom. " Ugghhh.... I knew what he meant though....food. Now I think I am a pretty good cook, but I don't live, breathe, and obsess over meal planning by any stretch of the means. His Mom, on the other hand, was a terrific little chef, but more memorably SPOILED her two sons and husband with it. She would get up in the morning and literally take orders. She was a regular short order cook. Dennis loved this about his Mom, who has since passed on, and so this makes it all the more difficult to compete with, if you know what I mean. Anyway, she relished cooking for her family, she owned every cookbook that man ever made, and she thought about each meal everyday throughout her day. I, on the otherhand, feel like I barely have time to breathe with 5 boys and homeschooling.
Anyway, I knew I was probably shooting myself in the foot when I asked the, "What was your vision", question, but I say dont ask a question that you don't want the answer to. Truthfully I already knew what his answer would most likely be. So I responded, through gritted teeth, but reminding myself it should be a smile. I carefully interperted what I thought he meant "Sooo, what you are saying is that you would like to have more planned meals at designated times. " A little bit of doubt had settled into his eyes as he knew that this was a potential sore spot, so he began the, "I love you for who you are", and "You are amazing with this and that", bit. Which I decided to believe...hehehe, but I said, "No, I asked because I want to know, and I am going to try harder."
Now ladies, hang with me on this. I felt pressed to make more of an effort. This book had said how even dinner can make a man feel special, because it makes an important statement to him, one that says you have been thinking about him throughout your day. That by coming home to a warm dinner he will equate this with love. Its truly the same thing as when a man takes out the trash without having to be asked. I believe that we should always desire to grow and improve ourselves, and why not with the ones we love the most. So, on our grocery excursion I started having a plan, and as I was asking if he would like sour cream enchiladas for this day and salmon fettucine alfredo for this one, his eyes had stars in them. He actually became giddy!
So I have followed through with this plan everyday since Saturday. In fact, I have even called him to ask what time he thinks he will be home so I can have dinner on the table. This man has been on cloud nine. I am thinking that with just a little more foresight and preparation on my behalf, he has had a bounce to his step, a giggle to his voice, a rekindling of his love for me, and dare I say even life? I have been dumbfounded by what a little food has done for him. Let me make it clear however, that Dennis has never been abused in this area, but as far as when dinner is served, or how my attitude was while throwing something together last minute out of exhaustion, well I may have fallen short from time to time. I have been amazed how this relatively small gift has had such a healthy happy impact on him. I truly want to be a wonderful Help Meet to him, and I have seen the more I am willing to do for him the more joyous he is about doing for me. I know that is Basics 101 in any relationship course. I think we all need to be reminded though, step back and reevaluate ourselves, and question if there is an area where we can make an improvement. And you know what gals? *smiling* He brought home my favorite drink tonight, just because. He's so worth it!!
Wednesday, March 15, 2006
Posted by Trina at 9:38 PM