Wednesday, January 16, 2008

Foolproof

He must have a good wife.


How do you know if your razor is sharp? What is an easy and quick way to go about this? Well I seem to be a professional razor tester, so let me share my little tip with you.



1.) Step one:

Make sure you have your razors in either a dark drawer, overnight bag, or some other sort of area that hides the razor. This is the ONLY way that this tip will be foolproof. Trust me it works.



2.) Step two:

If you can forget that the razor is in the drawer, overnight bag, or the other dark location it's even better.



3.) Step three:

When testing your razors make sure its at a time that you are not actually looking for a razor, but maybe you are digging through the dark drawer, or overnight bag for chapstick, or some other blunt dull object. This way you are completely relaxed, and you are freely poking all areas of the space with your hand.



4.) Step four:

Just when you think you are close to the chapstick (or whatever item you choose to hunt for) place your index finger in a downward stiff position as to make sure that razor is able to make complete firm contact with your flesh.



5.) Step five:

Then just swipe wildly and even violently around head of razor, and if razor is sharp you will inevitably slice the flesh or even partial nail of downward pointing finger.



6.) Step six:

Once contact has been made, quickly and frantically yank finger back out of dark mysterious area, and howl in glee as the blood runs down finger. People may have the impression that you are in pain, but this is when you confidently share with whoever may be beside you that you are just celebrating the fact that you are now 100% sure that your razor is intensely sharp.



Conclusion:

This is what all good wives do to make sure that razors in the home are sharp and adequate enough to not cause husband bodily damage in the shower. ex: razor burn (what a shame that would be if he burned or chafed a little on his face because you were not responsible and prompt about testing all razors in home.) Be a good homemaker, don't let this happen to your husband!

10 comments:

Mrs.Martin said...

Oh Geez! Reading your post with my front teeth digging into bottom lip and giggling nervously. Razors make me more nervous now that my baby likes my bathroom area. You are a good wife!!!

Tiffany said...

(speechless) :o

Sis. Lori P. said...

ROFL! Now I should post how a son can check to make sure his father's saw is sharp! Jonathan required a butterfly bandage last Saturday after checking it out quite thoroughly... 0+0

Marisela said...

I tested the sharpness of my razor yesterday morning on my knee....but I agree with Teresa "Razors make me more nervous now that my baby likes the bathroom area." Hayden has tried to test them out on several occasions.

Anonymous said...

Ha, ha. I've done this a few times myself.

Tiffany

Cherrie said...

Wow, that was intense! I hope your bandage drawer is full. Not sure if I am that good of a wife.

Trina said...

The responses on here have made me giggle so much!!!!! I take it that this post hasn't been enjoyable!! hahaha

Sunydazy said...

Well, I'm glad to know that razor testing is a sign of a good wife because I've tested a few through the years. I didn't want hubby to know because I thought he would ridicule me...now I can speak up with confidence! :-)

Mrs. Guthrie said...

*lol* ouch. You are a good wife.... I am usually just bad enough to let him find out for himself. :)

Tish said...

How funny! Here I am trying to contain my giggles because the baby is asleep and I don't want to wake him! I can remember giving myself razor burn on my face when I was a kid becuase I wanted to shave like daddy. Now that I think back on it; I don't think I cut myself, but my face sure did burn. I guess I tested my dad's razor, and it must've been dull!