It has been a good day. It has been quiet in my mind and in my heart. We have had some prayer requests from a couple of our brethren today and so we are keeping tabs on them, but it is sweet to know that we are apart of each others lives.
I am a pretty upbeat, optimistic person. I truly am. I can normally find the silver lining in a rainy cloud, but lately I feel like I AM the rain cloud. I'm not crazy about this self portrait, and I'm desperate to get back to my former self.
I have been struggling to figure out how to bring about a quiet mind and content heart for sometime now. I know that I am warring with myself, for myself. I recognize it so that is the first step. I prayed and prayed that the Lord would give me peace and a happy heart today, and He has delivered. It's funny how many conversations that I find myself having with my older boys reminding them to stay encouraged while they go through their lives, and then I find myself battling the same thing I preached to them about once our conversation is complete. I know that there are always ears and we are constantly tested with the things we are convicted in. Again, I see the spiritual warfare, but boy oh boy has it been exhausting at times. Trying to not be a hypocrite and remembering my own advice has me on my toes, and a little bit on my face.
So now its the end of the day....well sort of.....and I am so incredibly thankful for my peace. I had funny conversations with Roman, the boys accomplished their chores in a timely manner, I spent some one on one with Isaiah while he got his haircut, and the baby went down for his second nap without a hiccup. I am waiting for my little Abram to come bounding through the door to tell me about his little day, and it all seems quite mellow. It may only last another hour, or maybe it will last into the evening, nevertheless I can see the difference in my demeanor today. Prayer does help......not just a little prayer, but a lot of prayers. Thank you for your prayers.