Tuesday, May 08, 2007

The Real Beauty Of Life


What is more sweeter in life? I find myself lying on beds, floors, or tucked around corners, being as quiet as a church mouse so that I can sneak undetectable moments of him at play. You know the times where they don't know they are being watched, and are in their own little world?


I look at him still and think back to who I thought he would be. I couldn't wait to see all the little parts of his body grow and change. To see him transform from newborn, to baby, to toddler, to all the other benchmarks of human life. He is Roman, and he is like no other in this house. Sure, I see a little of each of my sons in him, but he is uniquely him. I sit quietly sometimes, and wonder why he came fifth, how come God brought him to us at all, and just how plain lucky I am.

I remember when I was first married it took Den and I awhile to conceive River. We were genuinely worried that we may not be able to have children. Keep in mind that it was only nine months of throwing all caution to the wind, but it felt like a lifetime to us. My sister had conceived and bore twice, by the time I had conceived once, and we had been married only one year apart. I remember the whole family praying on our behalf.

Ever since that trial was over I have gotten pregnant every month that we have tried. I truly believe that God blessed my womb, but I never knew that it would be five times, and sons, nonetheless. (not to say that a girl would hurt my feelings...hehehe) However, I understand the biblical significance of sons, and so I am grateful.


So, as I am now an older mom to my younger children, I think I appreciate the beauty of motherhood more. I am more careful to take care of their feelings, and not so ready to push them aside for lesser things that can consume my day. I am not perfect in this, but I have come a long way.


I like who I am as a mom now. I have prayed hard to be the mom that I am. I can't even tell you all the prayers that have ascended the throne on my children's behalf, and even for my own. So many times, not having the answers or the solutions to certain problems. In this, God has given me more wisdom and patience. I am so glad, because it's made this mothering thing such a beautiful way to live my life.


16 comments:

Nadine said...

Trina what a beautiful post. I love your heart towards your children. Great picture of Roman. As I watched my son leave for LA I remembered when he was no bigger than Roman and now he's a grown man on his own. I love how you enjoy every moment.

Kim's Life said...

Oh Trina this made my eyes water. I look at myself now and see how my life is so hectic and full of work. I always feel so made on the nights when Im just to tired to give the children full attention. Oh Trina you are truley a wonderful mum and women.

Rosann said...

Beautiful picture, beautiful words. Praise the Lord!

Mother-of-Hope said...

Aw, look at the little man! He's standing still...for 2 seconds...all the time you need to snap a pic. ;)

I can so understand where you are coming from Trina. The jump from 2 to 3 is such a difference! It's just a completely different experience...I can totally understand why people have more than that...the fun is just beginning at number 3! Ack, but I digress...that my be a topic for my blog some day. ;) (((hugs))) to you!

Michelle said...

Trina ~ This is such a sweet little post! I always love reading your blog you always bring a smile to my face with the love you have for your family!
Michelle

Mrs.Martin said...

Trina what a beautiful picture of Roman, beautiful. The yard is green and the back shot so babyish and sweet.

I love thru all the chaos of life you express your love for your kids.

Cherrie said...

How precious our little ones our. You took some great pictures those are for the scrap book. Love ya.

LL said...

I just love your heart for your children expressed through your words and pictures. We all need reminders to not allow the "stuff" of life to draw us away from what's really important...

thanks for this lovely post!

meNmykids said...

Like you said, nothing more beautiful. Sometimes it just doesn't leave much time for anything else, just loving and mothering, and praying, praying, praying. Lovely post.

marykathryn said...

Well not to sound redundant, but this is a great post!! I think you captured every mommies heart and expressed what each one of us feels towards our babies and how we feel so incredibly blessed that we have them!! They are soooo precious...Love that baby Roman!!

momto3blessings said...

You just said what I have been feeling lately.

Fifi said...

Hi Trina
I loved this post! Roman is now a toddler and he looks like a strong boy!!!
I have always admired you, and often read your latest post to hubby! You have a very pleasant way of telling events, and you always keep me entertained. Have you ever thought of writing a book?
Love to you!

Lori said...

what a beautiful post! Your boys are so lucky to have a Mom like you!! I LOVE how that last picture is blurred around the edges...can't wait to see what you do for Mother's day now...hee-hee-you like that pressure?

la bellina mammina said...

What abeautiful post Trina. And the photos are gorgeous - these priceless moments...

KarenW said...

What a beautiful post! I am so blessed and thankful for my one and only son. I would have loved a houseful of boys but God saw things differently. I am blessed with my girls too.

Sunydazy said...

This is a truly beautiful post!
My heart understands it perfectly.